Trust in the goodness of people around

March 30, 2012
Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia

See life from a bigger picture. How many of you think that you are going to be here forever?

How many of you are thinking that you are going to be here for the next thirty years, raise your hands. How many of you are thinking that you are going to be here for more than fifty years, raise your hands. And how many of you are going to be here for the next hundred years?

We don’t see life from a bigger perspective. My dear, you are not going to be here forever, just remember. But all of this is going to be there, Malaysia will be there, Kuala Lumpur will be there, but you won’t be here. This was here even before you.

You will be here for the next thirty to forty years, then what, where will you be? What is life? Who are you? These questions should arise in you and when they do, that shows that our intellect is maturing. Are you with me? Do all of you agree with what I am saying?

So when we see life from a broader perspective then small, insignificant things fall off, all that little quarrel, worries, what that person said, what this person said, it all falls away.

So what if somebody insulted you; so what! The person who has insulted you will no longer be here. Everybody will pack-up; they won’t even pack up, they will simply go. There is nothing to pack here.
On your journey you at least have to pack your luggage, but here you will simply disappear one day, that is it. See this temporary phase of life from a broader perspective. When you see life in a broader picture something will shift from within you, you will wake up and see, ‘Oh wow, what am I worried for.’

Just turn back and see, ten years back you were worried and you are still here now. Five years back you were worrying over nothing, you are still present now, alive! How much time you have wasted in judgments, worries and in unproductive thinking, yes or no?

Yes, we should learn from our own experiences. How much time we waste in complaining and all our life energy gets drained and diseases come. Blood pressure, diabetes, cancer, etc., all of these are a result of unproductive and negative feeling. So we need to shift this whole cycle. We feel negative, then we see everything negative and then we feel depressed, and once we feel depressed then we feel there is nothing else positive and like this you go into a vicious circle. You need to come out of it and meditation, yoga and pranayama is all about this – How to manage your mind and how to uplift your spirit, and that is really the blessing.

There are three types of trust essential in life; one is trust in the infinite power that is governing this world. Second is trust in the goodness of people around. There are good people in the world, if you think everybody is bad then you will become bad as well. If you think everybody is okay then you become so small, you shrink and you will also be part of them. There are good people on this planet, trust in the goodness of people.

Third is trust in yourself. Many times people don’t trust themselves and that is the problem. So trust in yourself, trust in the goodness of people and trust in the infinite power. These are the three types of trust essential in life. Then you are healthy, otherwise you are paranoid. Have you seen people with paranoia, how they behave? They are very scared of everything and they try to lock themselves in the room. It is a mental disease. If you have to get rid of this mental disease you have to be healthy and know the three types of trust.

Now, to understand trust you should know doubt. Doubt is always about something that is positive, have you noticed this? You doubt in the honesty of the person and not in the dishonesty of a person. If someone says that person is dishonest, you will believe it, correct! We doubt in another’s honesty.

If someone comes and tells you, ‘I love you so much’, you ask them, ‘Really?!’

If someone comes and tells you, ‘I hate you’, you don’t ask him, ‘Really?’ You take it that he hates you. So doubt is always about love.

If someone asks you if you are happy, you say, ‘I am not sure’, but if someone says, ‘You look depressed’, you never doubt your depression, but you doubt your happiness.

When you are unhappy you are sure you are depressed, but when you are happy why are you not sure? Our doubt is always about something positive. We doubt in the goodness of people, we doubt in our capabilities, but we never doubt our weaknesses. You are not sure about your abilities but you so sure about your weaknesses. We need to bring a shift here. How many of you agree, raise your hands.

I am making you raise your hands again and again because usually in a spiritual discourse people go to sleep. Because spiritual discourses are like a bed of roses, it is so soothing to fall asleep. And in a movie you don’t fall asleep because they are like thorns, it keep you awake, especially if it is a crime movie then you can never fall asleep.

If you go to any Hindu temple, they always keep a coconut. Do you know why? A coconut is a symbol of human life. It is a shock absorber and that is how we should be in our lives, shock absorbing. A coconut falls from such a height but it does not break because it absorbs the shock. Our behavior should be like shock absorbers in the society, so that nobody can hurt our mind or emotions. Our body needs to be hard like the shell of a coconut and the mind should be like the kernel inside, soft and pure white and bringing feelings like the sweet water inside. So this is why they break a coconut in the temple and they keep it to signify, ‘Dear Lord, may my life be like a coconut, body firm and mind soft, pure and clear.’

If it is the other way around, body is weak and mind is hard like a stone then you are in trouble. This is the problem today.

We should have a cool head, warm feet and soft belly; this is the secret to good physical health. If your belly is very hard, then there is something wrong with your digestion, your intestines are not moving properly. So belly needs to be soft, feet need to be warm. If it is the other way around, cold feet, hot head and a hard belly then you are sick. It is a sign of sick people.

A sign of health is warm feet, soft belly, cool head and warm heart.

Some amount of whatever we earn we should give in charity. Just 3% of what we earn. We can’t use the entire 100% we earn for ourselves. We should give a little bit away in charity to the society; to the poor children or people who need it.

With charity, money is purified. By service, our actions are purified. With music, our emotions are purified and with knowledge our intellect is purified. ‘What is this life all about?’ – this knowledge makes the intellect pure. With yoga, pranayama and exercise you purify the body.

Q: My husband is unfaithful, what to do?

Sri Sri Ravi Shankar: I have no experience in this. But still I will tell you something, husband may get attracted to other people but his love for you will be more if you understand him in a broader perspective. If you have a broad mind and forgive him two to three times and then you put your foot down on the fourth time and say no, then he will learn. You should not put your foot down on the first time. Three times you forgive him, but the fourth time put your foot down.

There is a secret about relationships, do you want to know?

The secret for women is that you must always praise your husband. Never put him down. Pump his ego. The whole world may say your husband has no brains, but you should not say that. You should say, ‘You have great brains, but you don’t use it.’

If you put the ego down of a man he becomes like a vegetable. Never tell him, ‘You are a vegetable, you are good for nothing.’ You should tell him you are the perfect man and you should encourage him, give him lots of praise and boost his ego. Got it!

The secret for men is you must never stamp on the emotions of your wife. If she complains about her brother or father or mother, don’t join her bandwagon but just keep quiet. If you complain about her family she can’t tolerate it. She can complain, but you should keep your mouth shut, then you will have peace at home. And if she wants to go for shopping, don’t say no; give her your credit card. For religious functions and for shopping you should not stop her. Being spiritual helps us to perform the duties towards the family better.

How many of you have experienced this? See, if your mental health is good and you feel strong and wise, you can keep everybody happy.

Q: I seem to have trouble sleeping.

Sri Sri Ravi Shankar: You should do the Ayurvedic treatment. In Ayurveda we have the Shankhpushpi Syrup which will help you to sleep well. Also yoga and pranayama will help. You should do pranayama at night, just before going to bed. That will help you sleep.

Similarly some Chinese herbs and Ayurvedic herbs are there which are used to cleanse your body, cleanse your intestine and stomach. Once in a while you must take these herbs. Triphala is an Ayurvedic herb which cleanses the liver and the intestines. Once in a week it is good to use these Ayurvedic herbs. And regular practice of yoga and pranayama makes the body better.