Tuesday, July 21, 2015

Develop Your Emotional Intelligence

2014-11-24

Haryana, India
emotions 1
(Below is a continuation of the post The Ultimate Love)
Gurudev, I feel that people around me deceive me very quickly and easily. What pleasure do they get in doing such things?
Sri Sri Ravi Shankar:
Whether they deceive you sooner or later, how does it matter? I tell you, it is better they deceive and cheat you sooner than later. Being cheated later will bring more difficulties for you.
Listen, know that you are wise. Cheating someone is a two-way thing and takes two people to make it happen, just like clapping needs both your hands. If someone cheats and takes advantage of you, then it is also because you were not fully aware.
If you are alert of what is happening around you, then how will they be able to deceive you? So you should stay alert.
If you do not get carried away by emotions then who can cheat you? This applies even for your brother, sister, your own family and personal relationships. Do not let your emotions get the better of you. Emotions have their own place in relationships. Butwhere you have to be intelligent and act wisely, there you should not get carried away by emotions. Be alert and take intelligent action. Then you will not get deceived, and you will see that even your relationships will become sweeter and more harmonious.
When people do not use their wisdom and act purely on the basis of emotions, then you will see that they quarrel over very trivial matters. We should not give anyone a chance to take advantage of us, or deceive us. How many of you here agree with me?(Many in the audience raise hands)
If you have a lot of gold and money at home, keep it away in a safe rather than outside. If you carelessly keep it lying outside and your maidservant secretly steals something, then how can you blame her for it? It is your mistake in the first place. You should be wise and not keep it outside so that they do not get the tempted.

Gurudev, what should I do when someone insults me in a group or in public? Is it correct to complain about that?
Sri Sri Ravi Shankar:
See, when someone insults you, what can you do? You cannot control everyone's mouth. In such a situation, you have only two choices:
1. You also behave in the same way and insult them. But that will not improve the situation in any way
2. You simply smile at their ignorance. Just tell them that every person has the right to their ignorance and to display it as well, and then be quiet
See, even if someone insults you, it does not stay forever. For a few moments someone says something unpleasant to you, and it reaches your ears. But it is all temporary, just like bubbles in water. These unpleasant things come and go.
Who in the world has the time to stop and brood over these petty situations, or to keep thinking about someone else? So when such things happen, do not worry and get disturbed by them.

There is a widespread consumption of alcohol in society today. What can we do to curb this menace?
Sri Sri Ravi Shankar:
Just bring them all to this intoxicating satsang. I promise you I will introduce them to such a high intoxicant (spirituality) that they will forget all these vices. So many people have left smoking, drinking and other vices after coming to the spiritual path. So you should not shun such people. Instead, convince them to come to the satsang and then you will see that they will surely change.
Once you are intoxicated with devotion and deep love for the divine, you can never let go.

Gurudev, are you in favor of divorce?
Sri Sri Ravi Shankar:
No, not at all. But if your relationship comes to such a stage that it becomes difficult for both partners to continue ahead, if your lives become a living hell because of it, and if no amount of attempts can save your relationship, then I would ask both the partners to peacefully part ways and move ahead with their individual lives.
But first both partners must give their 100% to make amends and improve the relationship before taking the decision to go for a divorce.

Gurudev, please speak about the dowry laws in the country.
Sri Sri Ravi Shankar:
No one should take or give dowry in any form. I would ask all the youths here today to take a promise that they will not support dowry in any way. You should tell your parents that you will only bring a bride home to them as their daughter-in-law, and nothing else.

Gurudev, please speak on the issue of female foeticide.
Sri Sri Ravi Shankar:
I would say that it should not be practiced and should be done away with. I have heard that it is quite prevalent here in Haryana on quite a large scale. It is said that the ratio of female foeticide is 7 out of 10.
How many doctors are here? I appeal to all the doctors here to stop and refuse from doing the Gender based testing of foetuses. Female foeticide should be banned and there should be strict laws to stop this.

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